Got a bit of time on my hands….

…so I thought i’d bring you all up to speed with what’s been happening in my life!
Back in December i mentioned that I had some family problems to deal with, well they are still problems but I am learning to deal with them in bite sized chunks. First, my Dad is suffering from Alzheimers and this has been getting progressively worse over the past 5 years, but to make things worse, he was diagnosed with cancer some 18 months ago, originally it was a slow growing tumour that needed six monthly checkups, but now it has become far more aggressive and he is now waiting to die. To add to my woes my 89 year old mum had a heart attack in February! This is the same month that Phil started to suffer from gall stones!!!!!
So you can see why I had to curb my activity here on WordPress.
Needless to say my sex life has not been very adventurous of late, so I have no sexy titbits to tempt you with! In fact, for a two week period in April I was sure my yoni was going to heal over as it was not getting any use at all!
However, some good has come from all this, my older sister and I have now become so much closer (for most of our teens we hated each other!), we now are inseparable when we can get together. There is now an intimacy (not in the physical sense!!) between us, we talk about and share so much more than we ever used to. It’s great!
So, dear readers, I am back for a while, maybe I can kick start my sex life again so that I can share some adventures with you.


What’s been happening?

Not alot is the short answer! At least nothing of interest here, unless the few days I spent helping my Mum up in London excites you!
I will be going for my oft postponed tantric massage on Saturday, that’s carved in stone now! Nothing is going to come between me & a bit of “me” time now.
Oh, one thing has just sprung to mind….while I was away I got an email from an oganisation that conducts surveys. About a year ago I took part in research about sexual attitudes and gave them my email address for any follow up surveys. This new survey has a few questions that have made me take stock of my life so far. One question asks how many sexual partners I have had (partners doesn’t have to mean someone I have had intercourse with, it can mean any form of sexual activity) and I have to admit that I am a little shocked by my tally!
I freely admit I was promiscuous as a teenager, but I spent plenty of years in two monogamous relationships until Phil and I decided to try sexual experimentation in 2002 (we stopped in 2008, so there was a 6 year period during which we “swung”) but when I counted my partners, male and female, I discovered that between the age of 12(when I had my first proper sexual experience which consisted of masturbating a lad to a climax and letting him touch me intimately) and the age of 51 (when we last had a third party for sex) I had been touched by or had intercourse with close on 30 individuals! Quite shocking!

Our photos

If you go through my past posts, those of you who have read my musings before will notice that the sexually explicit photographs have gone! I’m talking about the ones that showed fellatio or penetration, not the ones that are essentially “naturist” shots. Lord knows that at 53 I no longer get worried about nudity, over the years I suspect that countless people will have seen me naked either on beaches or in spas etc. I don’t even mind that some will have seen my “girly bits”, you try climbing in or out of a hot tub without giving all those present an eyeful!
However, I frequently post stuff here that is not about swinging and I don’t want to deter readers from returning by blatantly posting images they might find offensive.
So what I think I might do is set up a separate blog somewhere with links from these blog pages so that I can post the more controversial stuff for those of you who want to see it. Blogspot seem to be ok with explicit material.
If enough of you post positive comments I’ll go ahead. Let me know what you think.

A new year and a new phase?

Those of you who have followed my previous ramblings here on WordPress will know that Phil (my husband of over 26 years) and I had been sexually adventurous between 2002 & 2008. We dropped out of the swinging scene in the autumn of 08 mainly because the novelty had worn off and we had become a bit disenchanted with it all, a “been there, done that” attitude was growing & we just didn’t want to push the boundaries any further back then.
However, events over the New Year period have sort of rekindled my interest!
We traveled back to London to stay with my parents for Christmas & while we were there we popped round to visit various friends seldom seen since we had moved to the west country nearly 4 years ago.
One particular couple, jacky & Garry, we HAD seen some 18 months previous, but we have a very special relationship with those two so we were particularly pleased to see them & thrilled when they invited us back for the New Year celebrations.
Now, before I go any further I need to give you some background on Jacky & Garry. Jacky is one of my closest & oldest friends, we go back to 1978 & we have absolutely no secrets between us. Jacky (& her husband garry) is the only person who knows about my lifestyle, we have slept together (not in the biblical sense!), sunbathed naked together, been pregnant together, peed together, even changed our tampons in front of one another. In short we are closer than you can imagine. The four of us have been on holiday together, and while I can safely say that our relationship is quite intimate, we have NOT swung with them. When we last saw them 18 months ago, I somehow got talked into “demonstrating” how female ejaculation works in the real world, as opposed to the stuff in adult movies, serves me right for bragging about it I guess!!
Anyway, back to New Years Eve…..we returned from the pub that the celebrations were held at & sat in their lounge while Garry made us all a cup of tea (you can tell we are all over 50 when tea takes preference over alcohol!). Jacky surprised me & Phil by getting straight to the point & saying “you remember you showed us how you were able to ejaculate, well we’ve been trying to do it ever since without success”. I have to say that at 12:30 in the morning I was not quite ready for that!
I said “maybe you are one of those women who can’t ejaculate, though I can never understand why as we are all equipped with the same basic plumbing!!” “Does that mean you want us to show you again?” Phil, ever the opportunist, piped up. “Would you?” said Jacky & Garry, who had joined us, making it hard for anyone to say no!!
We retired to their bedroom & I stripped from the waist down. Phil & I got on the bed & he started to play with me, it was then that I had the idea of getting the other two to join us on the bed so that they could watch more closely & copy what Phil & I did. Picture the scene, four of us on the bed, the two women naked from the waist down while our husbands played with our girly bits!
I soon found that a climax was starting to build & told them to watch closely as Phil dexterously massaged my clitoris with the ball of his thumb while stimulating my Gspot with his index & middle fingers. Sure enough, I got that urge to bear down followed by a spurt of clear fluid. Garry was trying to watch me AND work on Jacky at the same time, she was clearly enjoying the stimulation but no ejaculation was forthcoming.
Phil suggested that Garry should perhaps try playing with my bits to see if he was doing it right & with Jacky’s blessing he switched his attention to me. Other than having to tell him not insert his fingers quite so far up, he was doing it pretty well right. Before long he was rewarded with a jet of ejaculate in the palm of his hand, you can imagine his delight! He returned his attention to Jacky, but despite very careful & gentle stimulation, she climaxed but didn’t ejaculate.
So….what did we learn from all this? Well apart from the obvious, I think Phil & I have found a new outlet for our skills! Maybe we should think about becoming sex instructors. I know there are organisations in the States that provide this service, should we consider setting something similar up here?

Our alternative lifestyle

Those of you who have read my other post will know that I have intimated that my husband, Philippe, & I have tried a bit of sexual experimentation. This came about mainly because at the age of 44 & the menopause just starting to come over the horizon, I felt that time was getting a bit short. We have been married for years, but as in all marriages, there sometimes is a plateau where sex is comfortable but not so exciting any more. What I didn’t want to do was go to my grave wishing that I had at least tried a few things. We have a very open relationship, we don’t believe in keeping secrets & having discussed my feelings with Phil, I knew that he had the same thoughts. We just didn’t know quite WHAT we wanted to do! I should also point out that sexually we are very adventurous, we have tried just about everything that a couple could do, including anal sex (not our favourite!), all forms of oral sex, mutual masturbation, a bit of mild bondage (again, not high on our list of favourites), all manner of things that a couple can do together. What we had never tried was incorporating other people in our intimate lives.
We spent some time researching ways of livening up the sex, but the answer came from an unexpected direction. We were having a drink with some close friends of ours one evening & somehow the conversation came round to holidays, what we/they had planned for 2002 & where they/we had been in 2001. During the conversation they confessed that thy had gone on a long weekend break with some other friends we didn’t know to Paris. It transpired that one evening they had all ended up having sex together in the same room! No partner swapping you understand, but they none the less all ended up naked doing what comes naturally with their own partners. And they loved it!!
I have to admit that this sounded very appealing, Phil & I talked about it at length on the way home & the upshot was that we started to look into the possibilities of finding a couple who would entertain the idea.
Things proved harder that we expected but we finally found a really nice couple through MSN groups. They were called Will & Angela, lived near enough to make it possible to visit without having to stay overnight but far enough to ensure we wouldn’t bump into them too close to home!. They were an odd couple in some respects, Angela was in her late 30s making her 6 years younger than me while William was in his late 50s making him some 7 years OLDER than Phil!
We exchanged emails, then photos and finally made arrangements to visit them. I have to confess that I was filled with a mix of eager anticipation as well as trepidation. Here we were, going to visit a couple we had never met in the flesh, probably going to end up naked with them & theoretically have sex while they watched (& presumably be having sex too!). Quite a surreal plan….
Will & Angela greeted us warmly, we had brought along a bottle of red wine & some dips, we all settled down in the lounge & chatted….about all sorts of things, vacations, children (they had none), work. It all added to the surreal atmosphere! Eventually Will steered the conversation around to the reason for our visit & I took the bull by the horns & bluntly asked him how we were going to go about things. He suggested that we all transfer to the patio where we found they had a hot tub. Bliss!! Will, Phil & I got naked but Angela stayed behind in the lounge a while. She eventually joined us & we got nice & relaxed in the warm water, I could have spent the whole evening in there! When we finally got out, Angela handed out towels & we returned to the lounge, where we found out what had delayed her. She had closed the cutains, lit scented candles & scattered cushions around. What followed can only be described as one of the most erotic & intimate experiences I have ever known. Since that evening we have indulged in some pretty adventurous fun, but that very first encounter with Will & Angela was by far the sexiest.
The knowledge that eyes were watching us, the visual impact of being able to watch them, the warmth of the bodies in close proximity all led to a highly charged atmosphere. I know I came quite quickly, so did Philippe! After, we all lay there in a warm, companionable silence. I realised that we had shared something very special, although Will & Angela were experienced swingers, there was something very intimate & private happening between us, we became very close friends from that evening on.
This was only the first of many evenings we spent in the company of Will & Angela (as well as others in due course), our journey down the road to sexual hedonism was just starting.