A blast from the past!

Phil (my husband) suggested that I should mention something that happened a few weeks ago that could be of interest to some of you.
As you all know, I have a special interest in the subject of female ejaculation, I have mentioned it in several of my blogs and I have even written a whole piece about it in an attempt to explain what it is that makes me come the way I do. I am so passionate about it that back in 2002 I set up a Group on MSN called “the Wet Patch” that for a while was officially one of the top ten most read groups on MSN!It was aimed at both men as well as women and was deliberately not “adult” so that younger people could access it for guidance and information. In time it became too much for me to cope with so I took on an assistant manager who ultimately assumed full control of it when I decided to pull out. She took it in a different direction, which was a pity as I still think that there is a shortage of non-sensational information on that subject in the media.
Anyway, back to this piece, about a month ago I found a reply to my post about FE from someone who used to be a regular correspondent on the old Wet Patch. To cut a long story short, she had read my blog in which I talked about the time I attempted to “teach” my very close friends Jacky and her husband Garry how to achieve female ejaculation. She wondered if I would consider coaching her and her husband in a similar manner.
I have to say that the idea did appeal to me and I gave it a lot of thought and was on the verge of agreeing as she had generously offered to pay my expenses and even suggested that Phil should accompany me to act as a chaperone, however my very good cyber-friend Joy Nelson of Tantrachick pointed out that I had more than enough on my plate with all the other crap that was (and still is) going on in my life, so I put Christine and Paul off for the time being. But the option is still very much on the table, I think I would find it quite rewarding if it all worked.
I just need to invest in some surgical quality latex gloves!!

A tricky one!

If you have been reading my previous entries you will know that in my role as a community health professional I have special responsibility for breast feeding matters. What I also do is question new mums about their general state of mind, how they are coping with motherhood, monitor their babies and stuff like that. However, on Monday I was going through the “maternal mood” questionaire with a mum in her late 20s and on completion I asked if there was anything else she wanted to ask me about. What she asked me floored me for a few moments!
“before I fell pregnant with baby J I was able to ejaculate, there wasn’t much opportunity to have sex during pregnancy, but since giving birth I don’t seem to have had much success, will it come back?”
Hmm….you can imagine my dilemma! I had no reason to doubt her sincerity, but how could I answer that? I could have just fobbed her off with a suggestion that she speaks to her doctor, but knowing what I do about most GPs, I felt that was short changing her. So I grabbed the bull by the horns and asked her if she had been doing her pelvic floor exercises regularly as that was what helped me after my first baby. There, I had said it. The cat was out of the bag, someone now knew that I could “shejaculate”! OK, I know that all of you who read my blog will know that I can do it, but this was the first person, other than my close friends Jacky & Garry, who would now be aware of my capabilities. In a way it was quite liberating. I felt that I could now talk about it to people who could genuinely have a need for my input.
Maybe I should become a sex counsellor!
Anyway, I ran through the pelvic floor routines with her (her midwife should have done that), got her to try peeing and stopping mid-flow without leaking, and generally tried to reassure her that things would get back to normal soon.
I will enjoy monitoring her progress!

The “bugger” factor!

The expression “bugger,bugger,bugger” springs to mind.
Yesterday I was due to visit the massage therapist I talked about previously to have my Tantric massage (with yoni massage added). I had been really looking forward to the experience.
So Friday evening I decided to give my somewhat neglected pubes some attention (apparently yoni massage is better with smooth labia) and as usual got Philippe to shave me. And as usual, that led to some nooky! In fact it was quite a good session, I climaxed several times with accompanying ejaculations before building up to an almighty orgasm.
In the early hours of Saturday morning I got up to go for a pee and felt that dreaded twinge of cystitis. By nine o’clock in the morning it had turned into a fully fledged bout of cystitis, really REALLY painful.
There was no way I could contemplate the massage feeling like that and a phone call to Alison confirmed that there was no way she would do a yoni massage with me suffering like that. So the whole thing has had to be postponed until the first weekend in May.
To those of you looking forward to reading about it, I apologise. Believe me, I’m as disappointed as you are!

Monday update: normal service is being resumed! Thank goodness for Cymalon!

The controversial issue of female ejaculation!

Image from "Tantric Serenity"

I have been meaning to write this piece for ages, it’s a subject that interests me profoundly.
Let me start by giving you a bit of background on my own experience of female ejaculation. I’m not entirely certain how typical I am but from what I’ve read I seem to be fairly representative of the part of the female population that can achieve this phenomenon.
My ejaculations don’t usually coincide with an orgasm. They are the product of what I like to call my climaxes. I can have quite a few climaxes on my way to the big “O”, most, though not all, accompanied by an ejaculation. I usually find that my climaxes get closer together as I approach orgasm, which can lead to an almost continuous series of ejaculations. The ejaculation itself consists of a spurt of clear fluid at the first contraction followed by what is best described as a dribble of fluid with the following contraction. At best my ejaculation can spurt out 10 to 12 inches, certainly not the huge arc of fluid that can go half way across the room you usually see coming out of the women in porn films!! I have very serious doubts that what you see there is a genuine ejaculation, more likely either peeing or the result of a carefully concealed water squirter with the spout between the the womans legs….
My own ejaculate is usually bland tasting, maybe slightly salty depending on what I have eaten or drunk in the previous few hours.
Now I want to talk about why I know that what I produce is not pee. I always go to the toilet before having any sex or masturbating as I have a long history of cystitis, so having an empty bladder means that I’m not peeing when I ejaculate. Also, my pee is obviously yellow and smells of urine. I have peed onto a white cotton hanky & left it to dry, it was still yellow when dry & still smelled of urine. The wet patch left behind when I ejaculate dries leaving nothing more than a faint water mark & is totally odorless.
The best way to make me ejaculate is to start by stimulating my clitoris and when I am well and truly aroused (ie wet!) insert a finger into my vagina, about one to one and a half inches in and rub the front wall of my vagina which would seem to be where my G spot is located. That, combined with the rubbing of my clitoris will usually bring me to a climax and produce an ejaculation. Certain positions, such as rear entry, during intercourse which allow me to rub my clitoris while bringing the glans or tip if the penis into contact with my G spot will also result in an ejaculation.
I have always been someone who got very “wet” during sex, but I had no idea that whet I was actually doing was ejaculating. I had always assumed that my vaginal lubrication glands were working overtime! It wasn’t until I had given birth to my first child that something started to intrigue me. My midwife followed by my health visitor, both drummed into me the importance of doing my pelvic floor (kegel) exercises. Over a short period my pelvic muscles became stronger than they were before childbirth and I became aware that fluid was not only dribbling out during a climax but was actually spurting out. The more i exercised the more I was able to make the fluid spurt out. Then my good friend Jacky showed me an article in Cosmo or Marie Claire all about female ejaculation and it all fell into place!
Twenty three years on & I still ejaculate. As mentioned in my post “a new year a new phase”, I have decided to talk about the subject. Any of you guys reading this who want advice please feel free to ask me. After all, we all (women) have the same basic plumbing, so we should all be able to ejaculate. I think it’s the “I feel like I’m going to pee” mentality that puts so many women off & inhibits them. If you can just learn to go with the flow & trust that you are NOT peeing yourself, you will discover a whole new facet to sex & lovemaking.

I haven’t fallen off the planet…

…but I have been incredibly busy! I have been providing sickness cover for a colleague AND trying to organise getting my kitchen refurbished! So, yes, I haven’t been posting much here for the past two weeks. Rest assured that I will be composing a diatribe about the joys of female ejaculation very soon as well as posting more photos on my “alternative” blog.
In the mean time, please feel free to comment on the photos I have already put up, it’s always nice to get feedback…..

A new year and a new phase?

Those of you who have followed my previous ramblings here on WordPress will know that Phil (my husband of over 26 years) and I had been sexually adventurous between 2002 & 2008. We dropped out of the swinging scene in the autumn of 08 mainly because the novelty had worn off and we had become a bit disenchanted with it all, a “been there, done that” attitude was growing & we just didn’t want to push the boundaries any further back then.
However, events over the New Year period have sort of rekindled my interest!
We traveled back to London to stay with my parents for Christmas & while we were there we popped round to visit various friends seldom seen since we had moved to the west country nearly 4 years ago.
One particular couple, jacky & Garry, we HAD seen some 18 months previous, but we have a very special relationship with those two so we were particularly pleased to see them & thrilled when they invited us back for the New Year celebrations.
Now, before I go any further I need to give you some background on Jacky & Garry. Jacky is one of my closest & oldest friends, we go back to 1978 & we have absolutely no secrets between us. Jacky (& her husband garry) is the only person who knows about my lifestyle, we have slept together (not in the biblical sense!), sunbathed naked together, been pregnant together, peed together, even changed our tampons in front of one another. In short we are closer than you can imagine. The four of us have been on holiday together, and while I can safely say that our relationship is quite intimate, we have NOT swung with them. When we last saw them 18 months ago, I somehow got talked into “demonstrating” how female ejaculation works in the real world, as opposed to the stuff in adult movies, serves me right for bragging about it I guess!!
Anyway, back to New Years Eve…..we returned from the pub that the celebrations were held at & sat in their lounge while Garry made us all a cup of tea (you can tell we are all over 50 when tea takes preference over alcohol!). Jacky surprised me & Phil by getting straight to the point & saying “you remember you showed us how you were able to ejaculate, well we’ve been trying to do it ever since without success”. I have to say that at 12:30 in the morning I was not quite ready for that!
I said “maybe you are one of those women who can’t ejaculate, though I can never understand why as we are all equipped with the same basic plumbing!!” “Does that mean you want us to show you again?” Phil, ever the opportunist, piped up. “Would you?” said Jacky & Garry, who had joined us, making it hard for anyone to say no!!
We retired to their bedroom & I stripped from the waist down. Phil & I got on the bed & he started to play with me, it was then that I had the idea of getting the other two to join us on the bed so that they could watch more closely & copy what Phil & I did. Picture the scene, four of us on the bed, the two women naked from the waist down while our husbands played with our girly bits!
I soon found that a climax was starting to build & told them to watch closely as Phil dexterously massaged my clitoris with the ball of his thumb while stimulating my Gspot with his index & middle fingers. Sure enough, I got that urge to bear down followed by a spurt of clear fluid. Garry was trying to watch me AND work on Jacky at the same time, she was clearly enjoying the stimulation but no ejaculation was forthcoming.
Phil suggested that Garry should perhaps try playing with my bits to see if he was doing it right & with Jacky’s blessing he switched his attention to me. Other than having to tell him not insert his fingers quite so far up, he was doing it pretty well right. Before long he was rewarded with a jet of ejaculate in the palm of his hand, you can imagine his delight! He returned his attention to Jacky, but despite very careful & gentle stimulation, she climaxed but didn’t ejaculate.
So….what did we learn from all this? Well apart from the obvious, I think Phil & I have found a new outlet for our skills! Maybe we should think about becoming sex instructors. I know there are organisations in the States that provide this service, should we consider setting something similar up here?